Pregnancy insomnia is in full force.
I am exhausted, irritable, and done. But I can't sleep.
So Wednesday night, I has having one such night. I stayed up till past midnight, chatting about our pediatrician with another natural-parenting mom via Facebook.
Not something I normally do, but Mama couldn't sleep here.
So, at 1 a.m., I finally worked my way to our bed, hoping sleep would come.
I laid my head down, next to my slumbering husband, and began to pull my fluffy fleece blanket over my shoulders when I heard it.
Yelling. Screaming. Curse words. Slamming and grunting.
Right by my head.
I sat straight up and bed and immediately scanned the baby monitor - silent - and the television - black and silent.
"Babe! Babe! There's someone outside our window! Now! They're yelling! I hear men! Right out there!"
My husband was none too happy to be awoken. He never is. When I hear a dear. Or a rabbit. Or the wind.
But I knew I wasn't wrong. Marvin the Dog heard it, too. He was gutturally growling and all his hair was on end.
And so, crankily, he peeked out our blinds.
"Crap!" he yelled. "There are men and flashlights out there!"
He grabbed clothes and positively tripped over Marvin as they fought to be the first out the bedroom door.
"Lock the door behind me!" he whisper-yelled.
I grabbed my blanket and wrapped it about me like some mom coat of armor and followed him to our entryway.
The hubs left, and I heard the murmurs and wet footprints. And then we were both back inside. But my hubby had a story.
Apparently, the cops had pulled someone over at the front of our subdivision; the traffic violator then made the rather illogical decision and ran.
All the way to the back of the subdivision. To our house. Where he attempted to hop over our privacy fence before the cops caught him, slammed him up against it, and hand-cuffed him. Which is all of the chaos I heard.
The good old hubby walked out to find them leading him away and pulling quite a few illegal substances from his pockets.
Talk about nightmares that keep pregnant women awake.
I ended up with a total of 2.5 hours sleep that night.
But I was a little bit grateful, for once, for my pregnancy insomnia.
We are making some tentative steps toward buying a home in the next year. We live in a nice, safe, family-friendly neighborhood, but because we are military, we rent.
However, due to the niche market military town in which we live, it's financially smarter to buy. And we are considering it.
And after Wednesday night's fence-jumper, I think we're ready to make the jump ourselves.
Luckily, we're slow movers. Don't expect any "We bought a home!" announcements for quite a while. Heck, with our deployment schedule this year, we can't move any time soon, any way.
But I think it's time we start running toward something a little more promising than a rental home with a privacy fence that even the most desperate man can't scale.