Deck the Halls with Jugs and Holly

We decorated our Christmas tree on Thanksgiving Day.

Normally, I'm all, "No! No! Don't rush the season."

But when I'm whipping out the Christmas decor for 12 hours straight and spending money on a Frasier fir and leaving halfway through the month of December to visit family?

Well, we can deck the halls as soon as I see fit.

So, yes, on Turkey Day, we were singing carols and showing Ella the advent wreath.

As any baby would be, she was properly non-plussed.

But we kept on trying, dangling her our snowmen and Santa Clauses and ornaments we loved of every shape, color and size right in front of her poor little face.

Finally, she'd had enough.

Girlfriend wanted to nurse, and so, I stopped hanging balls and bells and grabbed her up, turning to the hubs and saying, "Can you just put those last few ornaments on the tree for me?"

He obliged, talking to me while I nursed Ella and ducked her wandering fingers, which like to pinch my nose and any other skin-covered surface she gets her hands on as of late.

He tied and tucked ornaments in all the right places until, finally, he stopped.

In his hand, pinched with semi-disgust and question, he held one of my childhood ornaments.

"Babe, are you sure you want me to hang this one up?"

With barely a glance, I replied, "Yeah, hang all those up."

But he didn't oblige. Instead, he asked again, "You really want to put this on our tree this year?"

Again, I quipped back, "Yes! I want everything I pulled out right there to go on the tree this year."

But he didn't budge. He didn't even move the outstretched ornament in direction of the giant fir in our living room.

I watched him, puzzled, eyes questioning, until finally, I'd had enough.

"Dude! Just hang it up there! Del Del [my God-mother] cross-stitched that ornament for me the year I was born. Of course I want it on our tree! It's been on every tree I've ever had!"

The look on his face would have surprised a court jester.

"Really, Del Del knit this?"

Then, he turned the ornament to face him, wonderingly, and began to laugh.

"Oh, now I see what it says," he explained, seeming relieved. "It says '1984,' the year you were born! That makes a lot more sense. I can see now why you want it hung. It just says '1984!'"

I, undoubtedly, looked at him as if he'd lost his ever-loving mind. My eyebrows were raised, and I was giving them the whole, "Really? Are you that dense?" eye stare, when he finally managed to explain himself.

Or so I thought.

"Before, when I just looked at it, that word knit below the teddy bear, read like 'Jugs,'" he said. "I thought the ornament said 'Jugs.'"
Anyone want to figure that one out?

***

I love my husband, but sometimes, I sincerely wonder where his head has gone.

So tell me, do you have any confusing ornaments on your tree this year?

***

Here's hoping your halls are decked with a whole host of (jug-free and wholly appropriate) ornaments this Christmas.

Happy Tuesday, everyone!